part 22

[smackenzie]

"What's Bader Glassman want?" he asked Lea.

"Gunther killed himself."

"What? He's in Toronto or somewhere." As if that made any difference.

"Bader says he's been back a couple of days. He really needs to talk to you." She paused for a minute or half a minute, and in that space of time Laurie shrugged up at Parrish, who was now kneeling next to him on the bed.

"What is it?" Parrish whispered.

"I'm not sure," Laurie whispered back. "What?" he said into the phone, because Lea had started talking again.

"I said when's the last time you had an AIDS test."

"Two months ago. I'm still negative. Why?"

"Gunther was HIV positive."



Oh. Jesus Christ. Laurie stared blankly at the phone. "Huh?" was the most he could think of to say.

"Bader said that's why he killed himself."

"But modern medicine - "

"Laurie, shut up. I don't care if you were tested yesterday. Go down to the clinic today and get it done again."

"But we always used condoms." Parrish was looking at him curiously. "I'm always really careful, you know that."

"I don't fucking care!" Lea sounded like she was on the edge of full-blown hysteria. Laurie could hear her get a grip on herself before she continued. "Just do it, ok?"

"Ok." Sometimes it was easier not to argue. "Why did Bader have to tell me all this himself? Why couldn't he ask you to do it?"

"Well I just did anyway. He said Gunther left a note that mentioned what he wanted done with his body - he wanted to be cremated, he didn't think anyone would have any medical use for his body, I mean he can't donate any organs or anything, although I guess the medical school will always take another cadaver. I know we were always short...."

"Lea? Body?"

"Right, sorry. I'm kind of distracted. I keep thinking what if it was you - "

"I wouldn't blow my brains out or hang myself in the shower." Now Parrish was starting to look worried. Laurie shook his head briefly and tried to make faces to convey I'll tell you when I get off the phone. "What did the note say?"

"He was sorry, he loved everyone, he wanted to be cremated although he didn't say what he wanted them to do with his ashes. He wanted you to play at his funeral."

"He what? Why?" Of all the people Gunther had known, biblically and otherwise, why would he want Laurie to play at his funeral? They both knew better singers and even more talented guitarists - although Laurie was no slouch as a musician, he'd be the first to tell you there were other guys and girls in Eden who were much better - and they'd hardly talked to each other since Gunther had gone to Canada. If anything they were already drifting a little, and even when they were sleeping together they weren't attached at the hip or really anywhere else. They were friends, of course, but Gunther was friends with a lot of people.

"I don't know," Lea admitted. "That's why Bader was trying to talk to you. I think Gunther thought a lot of you. He always said you were much better than you thought you were, and you were one of the sexiest guitarists in the city."

"We only had a little thing. I mean, a few months."

"Before and after that, though." She sighed. "I don't know. Call Bader and talk to him, ok? The funeral's Monday. Bader's doing it all because his mom is pretty wrecked."

"I bet. Ok, I'll call him when I get home. I can't do it here." Wait a second. "Monday's the Underworld show."

"I know. The funeral's early, probably around eleven. Bader still had to talk to the funeral home and the cemetery."

"Jesus. That's gotta suck. I can't imagine having to do that for Danny." He really couldn't. He couldn't imagine any circumstance under which he'd have to.

"I haven't told my mom. She'd panic." Lea said something indistinct to someone on her end of the phone line, then came back to tell Laurie "I have to go. Call Bader. And get your ass to the clinic, you hear me? I mean today. You pull this shit on me and I'll kill you dead."

Laurie thought that was a pretty tasteless way to put it, all things considered, but he didn't say so. He just promised he'd call Bader Glassman when he got home, then he'd go get tested, and he'd be at rehearsal tomorrow and she shouldn't worry about him.

"I don't worry about you," she said. "I love you. Now kiss your boytoy goodbye and go do your thing. I'll talk to you later."

"Ok. Bye." He disconnected and put his phone on the bedside table. He didn't even remember putting it there last night, but he must have.

"What was that about?" Parrish asked. He slid under the bed and kissed Laurie lightly on the mouth. Laurie got the feeling Parrish knew it had been a serious phone call.

"A guy I know, a friend of mine, killed himself." He debated mentioning Gunther's HIV status to Parrish, but Parrish guessed.

"He was positive?"

"Yeah. He was. We, um, we kind of had a thing a few years ago. I was just tested. I'm negative. We always used condoms, I'm always really careful, I get tested every six months. Shit, Parrish, I don't know what to do."

"About what? I trust you." Parrish kissed him again, still lightly. It felt more like reassurance than anything else. "When's the funeral?"

"Monday. The same day as our gig at Underworld. He wanted me to play."

"Who, your friend? At the funeral?" Laurie nodded. "Do you want me to come with you?"

"Why?" Parrish shrugged.

"To hold your hand, to be a shoulder you can lean on."

"Nah, you didn't know him, I don't think. He was a musician, a drummer. A studio guy mostly. He's been up in Canada working on something. Was in Canada. Shit. I don't know what he wants me to do now. What the hell should I play at his funeral? Fuck fuck fu- "

Parrish stopped his impending panic by kissing him a third time, this one more serious and more intent than the last.

"Shh," he said softly, stroking Laurie's face. Laurie closed his eyes and let Parrish calm him down. "Don't panic. You'll do fine, I'm sure of it. He must have thought very highly of you."

"I guess.... I have to go home."

"Ok." Another kiss. "Do you want breakfast first? Coffee?" Now a grin. "Shower?"

"No, I gotta go." Laurie reluctantly rolled away from Parrish and out of bed. "I have to call his brother, find out what I need to do now. Get the details. Lea wants me to go to the clinic and get tested again."

"Probably not a bad idea. I'll go as well. It's been a while for me."

"Since you were tested...?" Laurie stopped getting dressed and looked at Parrish over his shoulder. Parrish had sat up in bed and was smiling a strange little smile.

"A while since I slept with anyone," he said.

"Oh."

"You were worth waiting for, Laurie."

"Oh." What did you say to that? "I liked it too. I want to see you again, after... this." He waved his arm vaguely, indicating the funeral and the Underworld show and pretty much everything. "I think - come to the gig on Monday. I'll put your name on the list, if there is one. I'll tell the guy at the door to watch out for you. Whatever. Please come? I want to be able to look out into the audience and see someone I know."

Even though he usually could look out into the audience and see someone he knew, even if it was just some of the girls from Lea's lesbian fan club. But Laurie meant more than that - he meant he wanted to look out into the audience and see someone he liked, see someone he knew and someone he knew he could go home with afterwards. He had a feeling he might want a warm and welcome body after the emotionally draining experience that he knew Monday was going to be.

Gunther was the first boy Laurie knew who was HIV positive. Gunther was the first person Laurie knew who'd killed himself. Gunther was the first person Laurie had slept with who had had anything horrible happen to him. A lot could be laid on Gunther Glassman's head, and none of it good.

By the time he'd dressed and used the bathroom and put his boots back on, Parrish had gotten out of bed and put his pajama bottoms back on. They went into the kitchen, where Parrish poured Laurie a cup of coffee and asked again if he wanted breakfast, but Laurie said no and swallowed his coffee in record speed.

"I'm sorry," Parrish said, as he got Laurie's jacket and helmet out of the coat closet and unlocked the front door.

"Why? You didn't know him."

"But you did. I'll come to your show Monday. I want to see you in action now." He grinned. "Well, your action in public. I know how well you perform in private."

"God, it was good," Laurie said. "You were great. I wish we'd gotten to finish this morning."

"So do I. But things happen. We'll have another chance, I know we will. If you need me or want me or anything just call me. You have all my phone numbers, right?"

"Yeah. Three of them."

"Good."

"I had a great time last night. And this morning. Thanks for dinner and everything."

"Oh, it was my pleasure. I'll see you soon."

"Very."

They kissed goodbye, then kissed goodbye again, and then Laurie pulled himself away from this very sweet, very cute, very sexy boy, and he went down through the building and out the door, and he found his bike and put on his helmet and kickstarted the engine and headed home.



words: 1681
total words: 43,445

Comments

[byrne.livejournal.com]

No sarcasm, just me into your story and liking the way you tell the tale. :-)